Transitions - What Do You Do When You're Not Ready For The Challenge?
When I was 25 I had my first child. I will never forget getting the news that I was pregnant. My husband and I had been planning to have a child for almost 5 years. When it finally happened I was overjoyed, scared, happy, terrified, and CLUELESS.
I barely knew how to take care of myself much less a totally dependent child.
The day I brought him home was the day that I really realized just how clueless I was. I remember my mom was there to help get us home from the hospital and she brought the last load in and then turned around and said, “Well, I’ll talk to you later!” and then left.
About that time Peter, my son, started crying. I remember thinking, “What am I supposed to do with him?”
I had to become the mom! I was the mom! It suddenly became real to me that I, along with my husband, was now responsible for the well being of another human!
My first learning experience was changing the diaper. You don’t leave a little boy uncovered for very long or the pee will go everywhere!
I had decided to breastfeed and knew nothing other than what they had showed me in the hospital. That was indeed a challenge, and then he ended up with colic! The crying was endless at times. The frustration was almost unbearable. I was definitely a mom, but felt like I was failing miserably!
Amazingly, he survived me and I survived enough to actually have a second, and then a third child. I learned mostly what NOT to do with the first child, so the second was much easier.
Becoming a parent was definitely, by far, one of the most challenging transition seasons of my life. But to hear them say “Mom” melts my heart and reminds me that I am beyond rich!
What would I change if I could have a do over? Without a doubt I would prepare myself more for the actual parenting process. I learned a lot about being pregnant and the labor process but very little about basic care for the child. Because I felt so inadequate, I stayed in a place of worry and anxiety most of the time.
Challenges are where you learn and I certainly learned a lot by hands-on caring and nurturing for a newborn. What about you? Do not let fear rob you of opportunities to grow, or experience new things. If you feel unable to take that next step in your life then let’s talk. We can find a place for your feet to land that will move you closer to the goals you have.
Second only to being a wife, being a mother is the most rewarding name by which I am identified. I love being a MOM!
Discovering life together!
Martha